Highs and Lows

There are a lot of feelings that happen. Remember that time I got an internship? So I talked to them on the phone and it was great! They told me that they were so excited that I was interested in coming, and they told me what they were hoping I could do for them (creating a sex education campaign, and bringing it to refugees and college students) Like, I know I'm a teaching assistant for an infectious disease course and that I volunteered with refugees and that I wrote that all of that on my resume, BUT YOU THINK I CAN DO THE THINGS I WROTE ON MY RESUME? THAT"S SUCH A GROWN UP THING. WHY AM I BEING A GROWN UP??

That was exciting. So exciting! In a health department? Working with infectious disease? That's exactly what I want! So thats the high of this post.

Low of the post.

So I went to go talk to my advisor about the internship, just to make sure that I'd be able to cross all the T's and dot all the I's. She was really negative about it, which was super weird. In her words, "I only advise, you decide" (she said that several times, apparently I'm not a very convincing advisee). She felt really strongly that doing the internship was a bad idea and that I shouldn't do it, because it's a year earlier than everyone else generally does theirs. In the health program, students most often do their internship after their senior year, because they don't have the internship pre-requisites done. Also that way if the internship turns into a job offer, they won't have any classes left to take and can accept.

But like, I have all my classes done, and I planned it that way so that I could do an internship inbetween my junior and senior year. Mostly because I didn't want to go back to my hometown and work at a grocery store for 60 hours a week, which I've done every summer for the past 5 years. Ugh. I just wanted to feel like I was moving forward in life. So I've been planning all my classes so that I could do this internship on my timetable. So I really threw a wrench in my plans when suddenly I had an advisor telling me not to do this. Suddenly visions of working in a menial, no-brained jobs for 4 months with no friends.

Needless to say, I skipped the rest of my classes so that I could go home and cry for the rest of the day.

So I called my mom that day. Within 2 seconds of me on the phone she asked me what was wrong. (shoutout to mother's intuition). After talking to her, I talked to Papa about the same exact thing, and he gave me the same advice. My mother gets SO MAD when that happens, because she says that no one will ever listen to her until my father repeats her advice. Sorry about that mom, I promise you're great.

And because I'm someone who talks a lot, I called one more person, Michelle. Michelle is my public health mom. She's in the program with me, though a couple semesters ahead of me. We've had a bunch of classes together, and she is really one of the most incredible women that I know. She's doing her internship in DC, and so I called her, and she told me all the things my parents told. Again. So I guess the moral this story is that I don't learn anything by being taught just once.

I don't know whats going to happen. I don't know if this internship will work. But I do know that there are people in this world that I like a lot, and no matter what happens, it's all going to work. It'll all work out.

It is going to work out.